Imagine this:
You have started to make healthier food choices, but your spouse hasn't come on board.
You have been following a consistent exercise routine, but others in the family continue their sedentary lifestyles.
You have prioritized sleep and follow a strict "no-devices-after-9PM" rule, but others binge-watch Netflix until 1 AM.
It gets frustrating when we go through these experiences. I often go through such emotions and react instantly, but over time, I have realized the following:
- The reason behind such frustrations is due to the expectation we have of others. Years back, when I went for an AOL program, I learned this valuable insight - "Expectations reduce joy, surprises enhance joy". If we deeply analyze our emotions, there is always an underlying expectation that leads to suffering. In this case, the expectation is that other family members should start taking responsibility for their health.
- Everyone goes through a wellness journey. The starting points of this journey will be different. It is unlikely that our journeys will be synced with our spouses. We can't coerce them into starting this journey through logic, explanation, or fear. The motivation has to come from within.
- Until then, all we can do is have complete trust in the Universe and believe that our loved ones will also begin their journey soon.
I heard this phrase in a workshop - to influence others, just focus on your journey. This argument has merit - we cannot change anyone else, but ourselves and our behaviors. But will this eventually lead to influencing family members?
As I pondered deeper, I arrived at this conclusion.
Each of us acts as a transmitter of energy based on our thoughts and actions. When we make healthy choices, such actions emit energy into our external environment. These can ONLY influence others when their RECEIVERS are switched ON and tuned to receive our energy frequency.
That's precisely why I believe it is easier to influence young children, with our lifestyle choices. Their receivers are always ready to receive the energies from others at home.
But for adults (spouse, parents, in-laws, etc), their receivers might either be tuned to other frequencies or might be too distracted to receive our energies.
When will their receivers be ready? When they understand their NEEDs - the need for wellbeing, need for ease, and need for peace.