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Dec 5, 2010

My guide


My contribution to Sunday Scribblings

It was the first day of my second year in Engineering. Having accepted the fact that my dreams of pursuing medicine as my career option is impossible, I decided to approach Computer Science Engineering with rigor. But the first day turned out to be a nightmare. I heard my classmates pursuing programming courses during the summer holidays. Many of them already had a computer at home. They had familiarized themselves with Fortran programming (Yes, we studied Fortran in our 3rd semester). I came home, feeling utterly depressed. Having been the class topper throughout school, there was this sinking feeling that I was way behind everyone in college. 

I came home after a depressing first day. I clearly remember she was in the terrace that evening, preparing for some exam related to her promotion in insurance sector. She noticed the dullness in my face and called out to me. She had been the pillar of support during my school days, always encouraging me to perform well. Like water gushing out of a dam, I poured out to her - all my frustrations and doubts. "Aunty, I have never even seen a computer in my life before. I don't even know the basics. I had taken up Biology in 11th and 12th grade. My classmates already knew programming and they even have a computer at home. My dad will not be able to afford one. I better quit Engineering and join B.Sc.", I sobbed for a long time in front of her. I don't think of her as my neighbour and neither does she. We share a special bond - a mother I found in her after so many years. The next 2 hours turned out to be one of the most precious moments of guidance, mentorship and above all, caring love. She sat next to me, wiped away my self-doubts with her caring and powerful words and helped me take a positive stride towards Engineering.

Over the next few weeks, I was so scared to enter Computer Lab, worrying that I might break its functionality. But her words were my only support that helped me climb the ladder in Computer Engineering. Looking back after 11 years now, without my guide, I'm not able to imagine how my career and life would have turned out to be what it is today. It also brought a smile in my face, comparing those days when I was dead scared to step into Computer Lab and switch on the Compaq desktop and now when not a single day passes, without me spending a significant time in front of my Mac laptop.